OMG! The first semi-final is today!

– Here’s a sneak peak of Mr. Putin’s expansion plans. Go ahead and vote for us, suckers!

Sadly you won’t find your favorite Eurovision bloggers reporting live from the press center and from premier VIP seating inside the arena this year. Due to a series of unforeseen circumstances, which we won’t bore you with the details. But we promise to be back on location next year when it’s Italy’s turn to host Eurovision again!

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Hear, hear Romania!

It’s funny how quite a few artists, not to mention whole countries (and yes, we’re looking at you Russia), tend to conveniently grow a social consciousness if they think it will better their chances of obtaining Eurovisional fame and glory. That kind of mawkish behavior might be blown off as not being awfully charming, but the world wants to be deceived and quite often it works. It doesn’t make it less despicable though. We for one can’t stand it. If you couldn’t care less about climate change, famine in Africa, wars, child labor or refugees drowning in The Mediterranean, then don’t pretend to either, find something else to sing about.

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Grand final: Fun facts and what to expect

“In the beautiful, Norwegian village of Bryne you can find a piano like this in every home”

Yay, the grand final is rapidly approaching in Copenhagen! We just watched the jury final, and here’s a heads up on what to expect:

1.Ukraine: Tick-Tock sung by Mariya Yaremchuk

Struggles to impress us with a man in a hamster wheel. That’s nothing but a nice try when Greece has THREE men on a TRAMPOLINE.

2.Belarus: Cheesecake sung by Teo

Thank God the final at least has one song about cakes. Claims to not be Patrick Swayze, which is great as he never would be able to lift us anyway.

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You cannot believe what was going on in B&W Hallerne today

There were rehearsals. Actual, real rehearsals! With artist in clothes! Well, sort of anyway. Here are our first impressions from the second semi final:

1. Malta is definitely coming home with us

Malta’s performance was once again steady as a rock and we’re starting to get that winning feeling. And attention! If you look closely, you will see a selfie of us and Marco Mengoni as a part of their stage backdrop. We are very happy to be up there with the loves of our life during such an important moment in history. Oh, and yeah, we are also glad that 130 million viewers get to see our friendly faces, of course. Vote for us, Marco and Malta. It’s number one, peeps.

“And to the right we have an image of my favorite girls in Good Evening Europe. Do notice the fine details and carefully planned and coordinated outfits.”

2. Mei Feingold is still very angry

Half way through the song we just want to scream “WE GOT YOUR POINT THE FIRST TIME” back at her. Also, her stage backdrop looks like something from an adaption of a not so pleasant Cormac McCarthy novel. But thumbs up for effort and all.

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All humans have a right to Romania

There are two things that could never go wrong for Romania in Eurovision Song Contest. They are called Paula and Ovi:

Actually, it should be considered a fundamental human right to always have Ovi and Paula present in shows you will be watching at least a dozen times before it even begins. Especially during years when there is a high risk of drowning in half bad ballads from all around the continent.

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Final thoughts before the final

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“I will put this picture on my Tumblr”, said Marco as he snapped a lot of pictures of his ideal bloggers. That will clearly secure his victory tonight!

With the Grand Final only hours away we’re at the press center catching up on the latest gossip and behind the scenes updates. Before we’re off to throw on our finest feathers, we have time to give you a quick run through of tonight’s upcoming show, which might be worthwhile to think about when making up your mind on who to cast your vote for:

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Gearing up for the Grand Final!

All righty then! While most of our fellow Norwegians have spent the day suffocating in too tight bunads, stuffing their face with ice cream and hotdogs, we have been in Malmø Arena to catch the first dress rehearsal before the Grand Final. How very exiting. Squeal!

We can promise you a wicked show, the Swedes certainly know their stuff and you can really tell they have been gagging to transfer Melodifestivalen to a pan European format.

One word. Swoon!

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Stories from the Romanian desert

What do you get when you cross Scotland with Finland, dress them up in a glamor model and let them have a jolly good time in Dubai? Apparently Romania:

Not that we disapprove. The first 30 seconds of this is even very promising in our opinion. But it gets worse from there, and that is usually a problem. What is also a common problem, is when you are stuck at work wishing you were at home nurturing your hangover head and the filthy nerves that go with it and suddenly hear a song you forgot you put on and start getting all the wrong ideas. Like:

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