What we noticed in the jury final for the grand final 2018

We hate to be stating the obvious, but you are finished. Don’t you know vampires should stay away from the sun? (pic by Thomas Hanses/EBU)

Yay, we are at the press center watching the jury final before tomorrow’s Grand Final. This is, as many of you know, the dress rehearsal with a live audience upon which all the juries votes for tomorrow are based, so it matters a lot how the artists are doing at this very moment. Fuckups have been known to happen before and we have been known to report them. This is what we noticed: Continue reading

Our 10 favorites in the second semi-final 2018

Could this be the new Godess of Eurovision? (Photo by: Andres Putting/EBU)

We got 7 out of 10 of our favorites through to the Grand Final. Let’s see if we can beat that tonight! We had a big row at Hard Rock Cafe last night to settle on a list, the fanboys next to us looked a little scared. Turns out we have changed our minds about a few since we wrote the reviews, click on the links see which ones. Continue reading

What we noticed in the dress rehearsal for the second semi-final

As the actual jury final tonight interrupts with our busy party schedule we watched the second dress rehearsal from the arena. Here’s what we noticed!

– Lord Jon Ola Sand, give me the votes to win again! (Photo by: Andres Putting/EBU)

Norway: The fact that Alex is currently third in the press center poll where everybody hates his song with passion tells us that he’s in with a pretty good shot at winning the whole shebang. Continue reading

Hottest Eurovision male, 2018 edition

It’s not easy getting attention as a Eurovision artist this year. After all, we are in the country where everyone from renovation workers to police officers to the average shop keeper look like they are replaced by super models, and we’ll more than gladly accept a body search by security guards. But we still have a few nice guys on our hands and we feel the responsibility for awarding them for that, of course.

The jury has worked long and hard, binging on Chardonnay and trying not to drown in any #metoo sinking holes along the way. But eventually we made our list. And here be the points of the real housewives of Norway: Continue reading

First impressions from the first dress rehearsal of the first semi-final

Yay, we just attended the first dress rehearsal for the first semi-final and it is shaping up to be a fabulous show. Here’s our first impressions for you:

01 Finland Sandhja Sing It Away

We keep mixing this up with the Spanish song. Which is not a good sign in our book. Backing singers are sweeping the floor with their microphone stands. Hope they get paid by SVT.

02 Greece Argo Utopian Land

Those who think this won’t qualify are seriously deluded. Sporting steaming hot bloke who rips his shirt off towards the end. Opa!

03 Moldova Lidia Isac Falling Stars

We know we are entering into our final week psychosis when we look at each other in nodding approval for the Moldovan entry. If we can’t have Laika the lonely dog in space in Eurovision, at least we can have a hot cosmonaut doing a summersault on stage.

04 Hungary Freddie Pioneer

Stands on what appears to be a perfectly marbled entrecote, which is pretty great because we love a good steak! He’s quite beefy too, come to think of it. We’ll take him medium rare, thank you. Yum!

hungary first dress rehearsal ebu andres putting
Beefy Pic by Andres Putting/EBU
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Our night: Dining with our favorite schlagerboys, hooking up with our favorite artists and dancing with Helena Paparizou

Hooray and then some, we just refueled on mexican food and remembered we had a fabulous time yesterday!

We started our day in the press center, where we attended Latvia‘s and Poland‘s press conference. Michal Szpak looked great in his David Bowie sweater. We even got to ask him a question, which was such a sad excuse for trying to get ourselves on tv. But he told us his his soul was red and that he also liked Guri’s blue top, which was mostly white. And he said he wanted to touch us in the semi final, which is more than we ever dared to hope for.

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Hottest Eurovision Male 2016 Pageant

Finally. It’s the one time of year when we get to focus on the most important thing in our life: Who is the best-looking bloke in Eurovision?

The jury had a hard time this year. There were a lot of great applications, and many argued their case well, which once again reminded us what a great year 2016 is for fabulousness. In the end we just had to share a bottle of pinot and get down to business. The jury has taken the following criteria into consideration: looks, charm, style, shaggability, social skills, likelihood of showing up in Euroclub and the ability to wear clothes while being surrounded by highly dangerous animals. Other than that, we have followed the strict EBU guidelines, of course, allowing gay flags, but not at all relating to any kind of politics. Everybody knows those politicians are boring anyway.

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