Azerbaijan in need of a miracle

The quality of Azerbaijan’s Eurovision entries has deteriorated proportionally with the plummeting oil prizes over the past couple of years. A mere coincidence perhaps, but we assume hiring the best Swedish songwriters doesn’t come cheap. Besides, with the current state of the country’s economy the Azeris seem not in a hurry to host the contest again anytime soon.

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Hurrah! Second semi-final coming up!

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Oh, please! Get a room!

Tonight is a big one coming up for us as Norway is on, and no less than FIVE of the guys on our hotlist. We recommend a bottle of Chardonnay, Valium and an oxygen mask within reach. If all goes well and we don’t pass out with overexcitement before the Czech Republic sings, we hope we will be able to celebrate the following ten countries going through to the Grand Final (click on the links to read our review):

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Not again, Baku

 

There was a time when our thoughts about Azerbaijan were genuine. They weren’t always that nice, but you know, they were genuine. The real thing. Filled with passion. Defined by human rights, male attention and free booze. All that stuff that makes a review heartfelt. But oh, those days are gone, and now we are tired.

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Grand final: Fun facts and what to expect

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“In the beautiful, Norwegian village of Bryne you can find a piano like this in every home”

Yay, the grand final is rapidly approaching in Copenhagen! We just watched the jury final, and here’s a heads up on what to expect:

1.Ukraine: Tick-Tock sung by Mariya Yaremchuk

Struggles to impress us with a man in a hamster wheel. That’s nothing but a nice try when Greece has THREE men on a TRAMPOLINE.

2.Belarus: Cheesecake sung by Teo

Thank God the final at least has one song about cakes. Claims to not be Patrick Swayze, which is great as he never would be able to lift us anyway.

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First rehearsals. Impressions and fun facts

In case of emergency, please unfold the parachute. Photo: Andres Putting (EBU)
In case of emergency, please unfold your own parachute first, then help your children. Photo: Andres Putting (EBU)

So. First semi final is no more than a week away and rehearsals are well on their way. Here are some of the most important facts we have picked up on this far:

  • Georgia is way funnier than first anticipated.How unbelievably cool is it to bring a parachute onstage? If you are to dance around high as a kite onstage, why not bring your kite, we say. And there is a slight possibility Israel’s lady might blow us all up, so security equipment is welcomed.
  • Speaking of Israel, we have an announcement to make: Three pair of pants have been found lurking around the airport looking for their owners. Mei and choir chicks can report to the information desk in order to get fully dressed for next week.

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Gearing up for the Grand Final!

All righty then! While most of our fellow Norwegians have spent the day suffocating in too tight bunads, stuffing their face with ice cream and hotdogs, we have been in Malmø Arena to catch the first dress rehearsal before the Grand Final. How very exiting. Squeal!

We can promise you a wicked show, the Swedes certainly know their stuff and you can really tell they have been gagging to transfer Melodifestivalen to a pan European format.

One word. Swoon!

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Azerbaijan strikes again

We feel very much in the target group for this entry. A cute guy with a schmaltzy ballad pushing all the right buttons. And we must admit to be slightly bedazzled by those sad brown eyes and the sulky crack in his voice. Knowing what’s under that t-shirt is also clouding our judgement. We really must stop clicking on all these web-articles where the various male contenders flaunt their six packs. Continue reading

Life after Eurovision

We spotted these guys in the Gay Parade in Oslo earlier today. They gave us an effective and important reminder that life goes on after the glitter dust has settled and the camera equipment has been brought back to Germany. Perhaps an inconvenient truth for those who gladly turned a blind eye to what went on outside of Baku Crystal Hall in return of a press accreditation badge and free entry to Euroclub.

Pic by the fabulous Mona Wærnes from our socialist party SV

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Fug or Fab, Eurovision edition!

So, Saturday it was finally time for the Eurovision stars to shine and bedazzle us on the red carpet before the official opening party! We heard rumors the party wasn’t that great, so we’re not sorry one bit we weren’t there. We never show up at parties without finger food anyways. But at least an EBU photographer caught the action through his lens and and shared his pics with everyone on the official Eurovision website. As a reward someone should give this guy an introductory course in how to capture the glamour of celebs strolling up the red carpet. Maybe next year he’ll give us something decent to work with. Here are some highlights and (a lot of) lowpoints for you! We’ll do the comments in alphabetical order. It should take you about 4 hours to read through this post. (Oh, and click on the pics to get a bigger image.)

Not happy about Eurovision being held in Baku? Blame these two! But Ell&Nikki sure set the standard for looking swell on the red carpet. Low key, yet stylish and trendy. And Nikki doesn’t look like Ell’s mum at all. Definitely a Fab from the GEE jury.

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