Forgettable Swedish disney gospel

Oh, crap, we forgot Sweden is in this competition too:

The Swedish delegation is on their way to Tel Aviv as we speak, and as usual they are dead sure of winning. Sweden is also doing well in the odds. As usual. It’s like we want to scream: “Who run the world? Sweden”. But is that really the story?

We find it hard to believe. We mean, we have been listening to Eurovision entries on Spotify non-stop for at least a month now, and we keep forgetting Sweden.Which is well-done as they are in fact our neighbour country and at least one of us grew up a lot closer to Sweden than to Oslo and Sweden is f-ing everywhere in Eurovision.

The singer claims the right to sing gospel, even when you are called John Lundvik and grew up in Växsjö in the middle of the country. That’s all right with us, especially when you have a silky voice like John here, but we wish it was gospel that didn’t sound like it came straight out of an animated Disney feature. We keep imagining a forthcoming movie about an aging, widowed Cinderella accompanied by John, naggingly asking whether it is too late for love. And then Prince Charming, that only just got past his last divorce and started drinking protein shakes, shows up on a newly acquired motor bike and promises to be the sun that lights everybody’s dark. And seriously. Who wants to see that movie? Maybe a few lost souls in Växsjö and that’s it.

John Lundvik is an experienced song writer, but if he wants to continue with that, he should either do an online course in writing lyrics or have someone else write those. The melody in itself isn’t halv bad. A little too hallelujah and shouty for us, who live in the most hallelujah part of Norway and have our daily struggle with avoiding those words. But we get why others like it, we guess. We’ll give Sweden half a point for always knowing that.

We’re also excited to see John Lundvik in press conference action. Our Växsjö guy sparked quite the controversy in politically correct Sweden after talking about his “race”, claiming that one should be allowed to use the n-word and call people “black” instead of “african-american” and the list goes on. It was quite unfortunate and we cannot for the love of God understand why song writers and artists are allowed to talk to media in the first place. But in Eurovision there’s no way around it, so let’s hope he got a few PR hints along the way.

Either way, we can’t see Sweden running this world in 2019. But we wish John Lundvik all the best when he receives that job offer from Disney/Harlem Tabernacle Choir.

What do mean one has to wear clothes in the Synagogues of Israel? Didn’t they know this is the clothes of Adam?


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