OK, let’s be honest. Looks do matter. A great deal. Why else would so many people around the world be so rich from designing, sewing, brushing, styling and pumping botox to all the wrong and wrong places? We have to say, we appreciate the efforts of all those who made the men of this year’s Eurovision. In GEE headquarters we spend most of May drooling over the ones who think this wonderful contest is all about the right tune. For the latter we find them adorable, and here are some extra points for them being hot as well:
1 point go to Ivan Broggini, Switzerland:
This year’s TinTin of Switzerland barely made it to the list. After all there has been some hair issues, including the most advanced carving of his back head. But OK, he is adorable enough. So here goes the one point from us with a kiss.
2 points go to Rambo Amadeus, Montenegro:
Ok, so he wouldn’t make our head turn in the street. But still, he is major funny. And that is major sexy. At least two points worth of it.
3 points go to Max Jason Mai, Slovakia:
Max looks a bit like someone crossed a girl with Joey Tempest. But he is pretty. And do take a look at his body. It makes us wish he was on YouPorn, not YouTube. But who knows, maybe he is?
4 points go to Jónsi, Iceland:
Cute, adorable and all that. Not much else. And he did suffer a major setback on our point system when he forgot to shine his shoes for the opening party. Don’t make that red carpet dirty again, will you? Or president Aliyev would probably go broke at the dry cleaners.
5 points unfortunately go to Pasha Parfeny, Moldova:
Unfortunately because Pasha was really destined for a better place in this Pageant. After all he instantly became our man for life when a reporter asked him how he prepared for concerts and he answered “I make sex”. But that was before beigegate at the opening party and before he got rid of all his nicest accessories, meaning a brass band full of hunky guys. Guess only a pair of leather slacks can save him now.
6 points go to Roman Lob, Germany
Oh, that silky voice and that even silkier face is what makes us calm in the evening. Roman Lob is pretty. Oh, so pretty. But unfortunately we do not dare to give him more points before we know what’s under that hat, and it doesn’t seem like he’s willing to show us.
7 points go to Tooji, Norway
Tooji is by far the prettiest face in this competition, we dare say. Actually he is so steaming hot and so utterly nice that even though we gave him a major handicap for the sake of not being biased, he still managed 7 points. Congratulations, hon. We love you. A lot.
8 points go to Ott Lepland, Estonia
Estonia always manages to deliver us something yummy, and Ott is cute as a cupcake. We’ll protect you from Sweden and all other bad things forever, sweetie.
10 points go to Can Bonomo, Turkey
Oh, yes, we Can. We are utterly charmed by this lonely sailor’s fabulous style, smooth moves and what seems like a lovely attitude. He is not only a pretty boy, but also a very cool one. And that scores him a very secure place in the GEE heaven. If only he can get his boat to go there.
12 points most undoubtedly and very well deserved go to…Csaba Walkó, HUNGARY:
Name one other person that could put on a glitter top and still look as macho as this? We are hungry for Csaba, that’s for sure. Did we mention he is surrounded by more men of the same caliber? Hand us the popcorn, we’ll watch him forever.
HAHAHAHA Awesome idea! Great #1 choice XD, my fave too XD but what about Lukas from Austria?! LOL But yeah you are right there were heaps to choose from this year XD As for girls, the smallest one of the Babushkis has got to be the hottest XD
We have no idea about the Austrian guys, their entry was so horrifying we couldn’t stand to even look at them!
Perhaps we’ll make a list for the girls next year. The tiny babushka would definitely be right up there this year. Seriously considering to steal her look for the next Eurovision party we attend. Would be a lot easier than to go for the Greek look at least!
You have VERY BAD taste!! You like all the skanky men (apart from Tooji, of course!)
Look at the bright side, at least we won’t be fighting over the same men! Would love to see your list of the hottest men in ESC!
HAHAHAHA Awesome idea! Great #1 choice XD, my fave too XD but what about Lukas from Austria?! LOL But yeah you are right there were heaps to choose from this year XD As for girls, the smallest one of the Babushkis has got to be the hottest XD
We have no idea about the Austrian guys, their entry was so horrifying we couldn’t stand to even look at them!
Perhaps we’ll make a list for the girls next year. The tiny babushka would definitely be right up there this year. Seriously considering to steal her look for the next Eurovision party we attend. Would be a lot easier than to go for the Greek look at least!