One night only for Malta

If Eurovision had a Mr/Miss Congeniality contest, Malta would win it pretty much every year. They seem to have a way of picking likable, enthusiastic performers with a big heart for Eurovision, who throws themselves into it and seem to enjoy every second of the whole experience regardless of where they end up on the scoreboard in the end. We like that attitude. After all this is meant to be the very spirit of this contest. A place for people from countries across Europe to meet in a friendly battle over music to create understanding and mutual respect for each other.

That’s why we yet again find ourselves in the difficult position where we have to trash yet another of Malta’s entries. Because Kurt Calleja’s frantic night is not much to write home about. It’s music out of a tin can, and don’t be fooled by the glossy packaging in the form of an overproduced studio recording and a promo video that could have been the intro to the next season of Glee. Because the content is soggy, generic, unoriginal and uninspired. Kurt is so eager and it’s impossible not to be taken by his kind eyes and cute smile. He looks like Ross’ baby brother in Friends and you’d half expect Rachel, Phoebe and the rest of the gang to join him on that couch.

Gah, it’s almost like slapping a cute puppy, we feel so mean criticizing. But it has to be said, we can’t like a song just for the effort put in. If Kurt and his crew manage to recreate some of the energy and vibe from the video on stage in Baku, he might land a half decent result in the semi-final. But if it’s something remotely similar to how it looked and sounded like in the Maltese national final we seriously recommend everybody to find something else to do than watch for the three minutes he’s on. We’d rather have a wax job using wallpaper glue than having to sit through it.

So Kurt should just enjoy it while it lasts. Thursday night is the night for him. He won’t reach very far beyond that, we reckon.

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