The official welcome party of Eurovision Song Contest 2011 went down on Saturday and since we were not there parading up the red carpet like
we did last year, we have decided that it wasn’t half as good, and we probably didn’t miss out on anything. Most of the Eurovision celebs had thrown on their fanciest rags for the occasion, and let’s just say that some have a better sense of style than others…
Flipping through the pics from eurovision.tv we can at least point out a couple of observations. The EBU photographer is clearly no fashion photographer, in fact, we wonder if he has even held a camera in his hands ever before. And at times we wonder if this is even taken from the right event as it looks more like some random guy’s Facebook album from a Halloween party he attended in high school. Good grief! Very well, here’s some red carpet highlights and lowlights for you.
Oh dear Kati, you make it so hard for us to love you! We mean, what is this you’re wearing? You are supposed to be a steaming hot MILF, the Queen of the Disco and a super fab Eurovision Diva, not some washed out housewife, doing all her shopping from the discount racks at H&M. We are almost giving up on you, last chance to redeem yourself is in tomorrow’s semi-final
Anastasiya Vinnikova from Belarus didn’t even bother to go shopping, she just raided her granny’s closet in Minsk before she left. Guess this is how you look like when you’re free, friendly and young in a dictatorship.
Ok, what happened here Lena? We like you better when you look like a witch with your signature LBD, you are not fooling us with your frumpy Snow White outfit. Did you miss out on Kate and William’s wedding last weekend? In that case, where’s your hat? We’d be more forgiving if you had something resembling a satellite dish on your head at the very least. And nice posing, you look like a 4 year old, who’s about to pull her skirt over her head in the next shot.
That’s more like it! Dino Merlin from Bosnia & Herzegovina proves that age and beauty can be combined.
Well, hello there, how are you doing? Vlatko Ilievski from FYR Macedonia looking super cool in his Ray Ban shades and Didrik’s waiter jacket from last year’s MGP final. As we all remember Didrik abandoned the waiter image for a way more dull accountant look in the ESC final. Let’s hope Vlatko doesn’t make the same mistake.
WTF are you all looking at? Do you think we like participating in the Eurovision Song Contest? Yeah, that’s right 3JS from The Netherlands, just to make sure that everybody understands exactly how boring you are, go for a combination of brown, grey and black. Yawn!
Our fav Danish friends looking simply fab! Last night one of us dreamt that Denmark won the ESC and that she was marrying lead singer Tim Schou. We sure hope at least one of these things will come true. You’ll have to be a cool cat to pull off that one-piece Tim is wearing here, not that he has any trouble in that department, he would look amazing in a shopping bag from Baby Gap. He’s a bit too tanned for passing as a emo rocker dude though, he should borrow some sunscreen from the other guys in the band.
Iceland represent a more rugged and raw version of the Nordic man, and we fancy that too! Real men in shining armor coming to the rescue on their Icelandic ponies, gosh we are nearly swooning just by the thought of it! Cheap touristy t-shirts do not fit in to this equation. That only makes you look like Vicky Pollard’s cousins.
Talking about cheap, they know how to do that look in Central Europe as well! Here represented by the Twiiiins from Slovakia doing their best to transform themselves from pretty looking girls to slutty chavs. Maybe we’re way off here, but in our humble opinion there’s nothing stylish about having what looks like a nasty rash of some sort on your boobs, nor a clunky Mick Jagger mouth over a swimsuit one size too small.
Woha, this is where the Halloween party starts! Not sure what these folks are dressed up as, but we’re guessing it’s Portuguese revolutionists. Loving the bagpipes, an attempt to score a few votes from the UK, perhaps?
And then there’s Aurela from Albania, bless her, showing off her nice little tutu skirt. You gotta hand it to her, she plays the part well of being one scary, psycho bitch. We’re sure she’s a doll out of character with hobbies like knitting and bird watching when she’s not preoccupied with impersonating the female version of Beelzebub on stages across Europe and the United States.