We’re moving on to one of the other Nordic countries that will choose their song for Düsseldorf on February 12, namely Finland, to see if they have managed to pull something decent out of their semi-final hat this season. We loved the quirky, folksy celebration of a song from last year, and we’re telling you, this was one of the few acts from the first semi-final which got a heartfelt and enthusiastic cheer from the crowd at Telenor Arena. We suppose you had to be there to feel it, since it obviously did not transcend onto the televoters around Europe. But this is just bygones by now, let’s concentrate on Euroviisut 2011!
However before we give you our verdict on this year’s selection, we need to take a moment and clear some stuff up. Regarding the Finns. There’s a vail of enigma surrounding the Finns, we think. Even though they’re our neighbors we sometimes feel we don’t understand the first thing about them. Perhaps it’s the language issue, or rather the fact that they hardly ever say a word, even when they’re drunk. Hours of suffering through Finnish TV-dramas when we were kids has taken its toll. The Finns don’t exactly seem to be the most cheerful people on earth, often displayed in Eurovision through sinister, dark songs in minor. But it doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing, sometimes it can be so beautiful it hurts, it hits a cord deep down there somewhere. And we love the Finns for being strange and different, and for their passion for tango and for sticking to traditions at the same time as being state of the art modern and stylish.
Pew, good to get that off our chests! So without further ado we have now listened through all the Euroviisut songs on offer and watched the preliminary rounds’ YouTube clips and given it all long and serious consideration. We’re sure you all are about to burst with anticipation to hear what we think!
Eveliina Määttä – Dancing in the dark
We struggle to find out whether Eveliina has stolen Natalia Barbu’s outfit from when she represented Moldova in 2007 or if it’s just some rags she picked up from a garbage can. Since the ESC was in Helsinki that year it might be a combination of the two, in the case Natalia threw away her stage outfit to avoid overweight on the flight back. Perhaps YLE should consider emptying the trash cans more often then. Anyways, we’re thinking Eveliina might have picked up the song from the trash also cause this is rather dreary stuff. No energy, no nerve, just flat and boring.
Sami Hintsanen – Täältä maailmaan
Could it be that Sami here were abducted by aliens at some point and when he finally was allowed to return to earth he was misplaced into the wrong decade? Cause we could have sworn that this was a song in the 1985 Finnish national final line up, if we hadn’t known better. Big fat no from the GEE jury.
Milana Misic – Sydämeni kaksi maata
Ok, now we’re talking. This is good stuff. You can never go wrong with an amount of turquoise eye shadow the size of a fairly large Finnish lake. And why hasn’t anyone thought of mixing the Loveboat theme with gipsy rhythms and an oriental flare before? We suppose when you’re the daughter of a Finnish Eurovision legend and a Croatian musician you do think of that sort of stuff.
Paradise Oskar – Da da dam
Ooh, this one is tricky! After someone unexpectedly does well in ESC there’s bound to be a few aspiring hopefuls next year, aiming to do the same, by copying the success recipe. How can you watch Paradise Oskar without having the image of Tom Dice, or Jostein Hasselgård for that matter, racing through your head? This is so far from original as it gets, and we wonder if he can get away with it. And maybe he can, cause he’s so darn cute. And it is all so neat and simple. But if you ever make it to Düsseldorf Paradise Oskar, please pick up some fashion tips. Hel Looks is a nice place to start, it will give you some pointers.
Cardiant – Rapture in time
After Lordi’s victory it seems like the Finns believe they know how to make rock work in Eurovision. Fail.
Johanna Iivanainen – Luojani mun
This is perhaps the most Nordic sounding act in the line-up. We have know idea what Johanna is singing about, but she does it well, and it reminds us of some sort of children’s lullaby. Perhaps a bit too boring for Eurovision, but still it’s quite pretty.
Father McKenzie – Good enough
Sometimes you just love a song because it reminds you about something and makes you associate far beyond the scope it was probably originally intended to do. The theme in this song makes us think about a movie from the 80s, shot in New York during the fall, with skyscrapers and Central Park as a backdrop for yellow cabs and studio apartments, we have no idea why. Genre wise it seems to fall into the same category as the Romanian entry this year. Is this the next big thing in ESC?
Marko Maunuksela – Synkän maan tango
This year’s mandatory tango fling. Doesn’t do much for us we’re afraid.
Saara Aalto – Blessed with love
God, what’s with the bridezilla orgy on stage? No, no and no, this is just awful.
Stala & So – Pamela
So is this suppose to be this year’s favorite to win, since YLE put it last in the running order? The Finns can be very unpredictable voters, but we hope they don’t go ahead and choose this glam rock number. Cause this is nothing of what it is cut out to be. It’s not a good song, it’s not charming, it’s not funny, it’s not crazy enough. And who’s this Pamela anyways? Pamela Anderson? Pamela Ewing? Palmolive Shampoo? It ends up looking very unattractive and sounding equally bad. Nice haircut on the lead singer though. If he was a soccermom in her 40s, that is.
We’re suspecting the Finns to go for one of the rock numbers in this bunch, but we hope they decide not to. By the end of Saturday evening we will all be a little wiser, after both Finland, Iceland and Norway have chosen their star for Düsseldorf. We suppose we just have to continue sharpening our pens until then!